Who Am I ??
Its been a couple of months now since i entered the world of software engineering…a world, not of glamour and glitz, but a world of desktops and laptops..And what am I , an aeronautical engineer, doing here , you might ask ..Well, that is exactly what I am trying to figure out , to find where my life is leading me to…
It all started , exactly 4 years and 2 months back , when I entered the fascinating world
of aeronautics. The subject enchanted me..And like the rest of my fellow mates, I had this big dream of getting myself into NASA or Boeing..”What is the big deal “ , I thought, “ when one of my seniors is the President of the Nation…Screw software, I am an aeronautical engineer “ . That was the initial pride that everyone of us felt…It wasn’t a long time before we realized that Boeing was to be a distant dream..
Came the final year, the time when everyone takes the next step in life after college..We all waited anticipation, hoping for an aeronautics firm to just grab us and give our education a meaning..Alas, the entire placement team of my University screwed my dream up..And I found myself among half my college mates, and thousands of others – A SOFTWARE ENGINEER…
“Ah, what the heck, I still had my CAT to go..Just wait till I complete it and get into a get into a B-school “ , I thought..Life wasn’t a bed of roses..Like all my exams at college, I f^&*^*d up that one too..Damn..Probably I should have taken my GRE instead..aaarggghhh…..
“Oh well, I can still try for some job off campus..I am bound to get one, what with my good academic record and skills ! “. And applied I did, to every company that I knew existed in India. I just couldn’t wait for the day , when I expected to find my mail box flooded with ‘call letters’. Days became weeks, weeks became months..And still no mail…” Come on guys, what is taking you so long ?? “. With hardly a week left before I join my “Software Firm”, my hope started to fade.” Doesn’t anyone require an aeronautical engineer anymore ?? “.
Well , life had its twists..On a bright wednesday, I chanced to come across this ad by an aero company, which asked for aeronautical engineers, specialising in design. “ Hurray “ , I thought, “ atleast there is someone who wants me “ .. And so there I was, all dressed up for the occasion. An assistan came and collected our resume. Five minutes went by. And out emerges this guy, calls out my name, along with a dozen others, and asks us to step out. “Oh My God, the breakthrough atlast.”. With a proud walk , we followed that guy. As soon as we assemble outside the waiting hall, I heard the first few words that I never want to hear in my life again – “ YOUR PROFILE DOESN’T MATCH OUR REQUIREMENTS.PLEASE LEAVE THE HALL”. I stood there dumbstruck. That guy just asked me to get the hell out of there. My dream was shattered even before it could begin..
Cursing my fate, I joined my firm a couple of days after my birthday. “ What the heck are you doing here ? ” was what people meant when they threw that glance when told I was an aeronautical engineer. Not a bad start.And the weeks that came only made it worse. I found myself lost in the world of Java and SQL. Imagination was replaced by logic. Dull, lifeless logic. When the class around me kept punching that keyboard of theirs till their fingers broke, I was left gaping at my monitor, wondering what PUBLIC STATIC VOID MAIN meant..Life was hell. This wasn’t what I wanted to do.
And here I am, now having been trained in the much sought field of SAP. And one among the first batch ever in my firm to have been give one.”Your future looks bright”, everybody say. But, the vacuum remains in my heart. Won’t i ever get to design the flying machines I always dreamed off ? Won’t I ever get to use my calculator again ? Has my life lost its meaning ? Am I not the person I should be ? How will ecverybody know me as ? A Software Consultant ? An Aeronautical Engineer ?? Or Just Another Dis-illusioned Jerk ??
